Tonight on LOST: 'Dr. Linus'

O bliss! O joy! It's time to party with the Artist Formerly Known as Henry Gale. Yes, it's a Ben-centric episode, and those are always extra good.

Tonight's episode of Lost is called "Dr. Linus." Here's the official ABC promo line: "Ben deals with the consequences of an uncovered lie."

The obvious follow-up to that is, "Which lie?" Because with Ben, you know, there are just so darn many lies he tells that we have totally lost track of them. Last we checked, he was up to about 167 fibs, untruths, whoppers and dodges, and that was just in Season 3.

We found out in "The Substitute" that alt-Ben is a teacher of European history at the same L.A.-area high school where alt-John Locke is teaching biology and coaching girls' gym. The only other thing we know about alt-Ben so far is that he is pretty darn snippy about maintaining the coffeemaker in the teachers' lounge. (Woe be unto him who fails to remove the old filter so Ben can make a fresh pot.)

Don't know about you, but we are praying that tonight he has a run-in with science teacher Leslie Arzt, so they can snipe at each other with lines like: "That's Doctor Arzt to you, Benjy!" and "Well, that's Doctor Linus to you, Leslie!" Of course, we have no actual evidence yet that Dr. Arzt even teaches at that school, but wouldn't that be a cool cameo?

On the Island's timeline, we know that Ben last week fled the Temple in terror, after realizing Sayid had gone over to Smokey's side and so had killed both Dogen and Lennon, who were floating lifeless in the Temple's healing pool. This week, we'll probably see more of Ben looking for Ilana and her little band of Jacobites, including Frank, Sun and Miles, who have escaped the Temple via the secret back door, and who presumably will be in the jungle, hiding from UnLocke and his tribe.

With the Temple breached, there are no longer any safe places on the Island that we know of. Will our Losties perhaps retreat to an abandoned Dharma station, there to await the arrival of whoever it is that Jacob predicted is coming to help them battle the Man in Black?